Empty Seat next to me

I can’t help myself while picturing you sitting right beside me.

You would take my hand and the warmth would make me feel whole again.

I would take you to all the places I love.

Everywhere. Everyone. Everything.

You and I would go dancing.

You and I would drive.

You and I would cheer for our team.

You and I would kiss.

It’s almost like you materialize right next to me.

I’m so glad, I’ve wanted you there all along.

The seat is so cold,

When I shake awake and see.

See that it is not you beside me,

It is only an empty chair. 

There will come a time

There will come a time when you feel lost and thirsty from the cold bitter wind. It ceaselessly blows on your face, stripping you of all you have ever had. You will forget where you came from. You will forget where you belong. And you will forget who you are.

But that is only a moment.

And soon after, when you think all is lost, there will come another moment. This is a moment where water is poured out over you. And finally all the chaos, all the heartache, all the confusion wash away. There will come a time where you see it all come together. And all the places you’ve gone come before you, it makes sense. It finally makes sense. And in this moment, undeniable love wells up around you. It consumes you, devours you. It is love you have forgotten. It is love that you thought you lost. It is love that you have needed.

There will come a time when we will all meet again.

Embrace and love each other deeper than we have ever known. Every so often I get a glimpse of this type of heaven and it restores everything I hold toward humanity. We will love each other despite the hurt, despite the slander, despite the distance, despite the hate. Love triumphs over everything. It really does.

When?

It all comes together like a sloppy wet kiss. Smile brightly beautiful one for you know where to send your heart.

They say that it is only after you stop looking that you find what you were looking for.

It takes putting one step in front of the other to move forward. No other way around it. It takes rising when all others thought you would fall. Is this too idealistic? When will this be truth?

When?

Will not and Will

I will not take offense. I will not overthink or hurt. I will not assume. I will not judge or slander. I will not hold expectations. I will not forget. I will not regret.

I will laugh. I will smile. I will go in my own direction. I will be loved. I will see beautiful things. I will take action. I will be happy (so happy). I will do amazing things. I will love.

Every day. Every single day

The more I do this, the more I realize I don’t want it to go this way. There is this “ah-ha” moment when I realize that if I keep going along I will be SETTLING.

And I’m not saying that I am looking for perfection, god no. But I don’t want something so far off that I can’t even breathe. You arrogant jerk, no, you cannot have everything in your life.

One after another, my apathy is growing. Did I do this to myself? What have I done?

Nameless One, you have done this to me.

They say that once you stop looking love finds you. How much do I believe that?

Zero

I can’t hold on to these anymore,
I clutch them so tightly in my hand
White knuckles.
I still don’t know.
I don’t know at all.

But some asshole piece of me still hopes.
As I crush what I want in my hand,
It spins out of control.
Expectations.

She.

What is She?
Long, red hair (like fire).
Wavy and silky, just how you like it.
Quirky but smart.
Lively but not too strange.
Different,
Yet,
Conforming all the same.
She can wear the beautiful clothes.
She can dance, though you never would.
Smooth (beautiful) perfect skin.
Eyes that light up.
Teeth and a mouth you wouldn’t dare touch,
But somehow they haunt you.
Caring.
Wants a family, 2 kids and a dog.
White picket fence, everything.
She is a teacher-art.
Somewhere in her she wants you.
Don’t forget that she always likes to have fun.
Don’t forget that she can be your everything.
Best friend.
Idealized and eternal.
Your idea of perfection.
But when you come down to it,
She’s mediocre.

She’s just prettier than me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41R1jN26b4I&feature=related