Reality Sets in.

Does your heart panic knowing that I am going very far from you?
Does it beat faster and faster as the miles grow between us?
Does it feel a little lonelier as it sinks in that it may be a long time before you see me again?

But I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to do next...
The idea if you seems like a hill too steep for me to climb,
an unimaginable fantasy.
because you have the whole world spread out beneath your feet
and I could be just another puddle you stomp over as you walk across the street.
But I can't sleep at night because your eyes are the last eyes I see pierce the fogginess.
And I can see myself doing this over and over again for you.
Driving to Estonia, just to kiss your face, have lunch with your family on a lazy Sunday afternoon and laugh about your odd fondness for country music.
And maybe am I just so desperate that any person with kindness in their heart
and a nice ass
looks like a walking target,
with wedding bands and church bells stapled to them like a hazy fever.
I know you don't want that kind of commitment when you signed our friendship contract,
so that's why I don't know what to do now.
Because suddenly I've started writing sappy
love poetry with you in mind and
I have these silly fantasies of you and I together,
and I wish them into reality with all my heart and soul while I drift into dreams populated with your face.
You are everywhere in my mind.
And once again I'm doing nothing important while I wait for a dream to come true.

But reality sinks in the morning I wake,
and I realize the odds of you feeling the same way are about one in a million
and I just  feel like a fool the rest of the day.