Read this, just once

Hey Old Friend. It’s been awhile hasn’t it? What I love about you is that we can pick up exactly where we left off. Things have changed a whole lot. Do you recognize me?

Just once I wish you would look at this. Just once. I want you to see my heart. This is my heart on the page. I want you to see with your own eyes what you have done to me. See how much I loved you and then how much you hurt me. I want you to see who I really am.

I see you doing amazing things, finding love, being comfortable. I want to say that I am a bigger person, that I am genuinely happy for you, but not yet. I still have to remind myself to breathe from time to time when I think about you. I feel the world around me (you) set on fast forward and I am cemented to the ground. All I can do is watch the world turn around me. When you left me luckily you left me a chisel so I can have a chance. Slowly, I am chipping myself out. Slowly I am discovering what it means to step out on my own.

What I have learned for you: Love

What was taken from me because of you: Love

What I ache for from you constantly: Love

What I have to take for myself from this: Love

What I need so much more of in life: Love

What I want to give out more: Love

Promise me you won’t forget who I am forever. Promise me that we will be friends after this.

Promises have always been empty.